LOOK AT ME NOW

Having a discussion the other day with ILYT, the topic of de-friending people on Facebook came up (yes, this is the world we live in). We talked about how even though you may be done with a person, no longer wish to talk to them, and could care less about them- de-friending them is questionable. Despite your wishes to never communicate again, keeping them as a friend on Facebook (and this argument extends to Twitter, GChat, and any other social media tool) allows them to see how you've moved on, progressed, and are living a great life. In essence, keeping these people linked to you via some social media tool allows you to say "Look at me now" without actually saying it. (I realize that this is the point where some of you will lie to yourself and say that you’ve never done this. Let’s be serious, you aren’t actually friends with all those people that you are connected with via social media.)

This is a natural feeling. These same sentiments are what drives the class nerd to show up to the reunion with a supermodel chick, encourages the girl that got dumped to change her look and make sure she is on POINT at all times just in case she "bumps into" her ex , and pushes us to do better just to prove others wrong. Truthfully, disappointment and loss kick us in the ass and push us to step our game up. And a lot of us do just that. We make moves, we progress, we excel. And since we are all human and no one wants their success to go unnoticed, especially by the ones that, in a roundabout way, drove us to this point. No, we aren’t looking to send out little notes saying “thank you for breaking my heart/calling me fat/saying I’d never be ish….”,we just update a status, tweet, make sure mutuals are informed so that the story of our success gets back to certain people. We want to make sure they get the “Look at me now" message.

Here’s the thing. There are two ways to look at this. For Christians, we know that when do

things according to the Word in which we believe –in conjunction with our faith- we are moved to places we didn’t even imagine. (Trust me on that one-I've got all the proof that I need.) And we also know that when we live lives according to the Word and by our faith, we don’t have to blow our own trumpets- they are sounded for us. In other words, God does the PR for us. Folks that don’t even know you-know about you. And trust, your enemies (not literal people that you are fighting against-though they are included- but those that don’t have your best interest at heart) do too. Along with that, when you are progressing and excelling, your success will speak for itself. When you are on top- you don’t have to do a lot of talking- your work and your life speak for themselves. I’m always wary of people that feel they need to boast or talk about their accomplishments (usually material). Who exactly are you trying to convince? Me? Or yourself? All of this is to say, it’s ok to let people go. We all want to say “Look at me now” at some time or another, but actions always speak louder than words. So let your accomplishments do the talking for you. Remember, “You’re dope. Their loss."

Now cheers to moving on and letting go of the excess.

*I realize that there are moments in life where you certainly have to be your biggest fan, promoter, hype man, wear a billboard with your name and face on it- all of that. But what I’m talking about is keeping people connected to you simply because you want them to see how much better you are without them. I also realize that many people use social networking for other things such as keeping in touch,

rekindling old flames , business opportunities, stalking , and reliving memories. But the reality is that some people use it as a billboard of their "awesome" life- to flip a bird to all the "haters".