Matching Swag (for lack of a better term)

I'm a people watcher. I observe people and their interactions. It's just something I do. What's been puzzling me lately has been the increasing number of guys that I've seen dating or in relationships with women that don't match their "swag" so to speak. This problem is not unique to men, plenty of women do the same thing. I was talking with a gentleman last night and it came up in conversation. The more I learn about myself and what I want from relationships, the role I wish to play, etc...the more I realize different things around me.

Now to clarify what I mean about swag. I'm not talking about clothes, style, essence- at least not entirely. I'm talking about something more-ambitions, moves being made, professional and family goals and the like. We talked about being equally yoked and what that means today in dating. I can't understand how some guys are dating women who are complacent with where they are. No goals. Not trying to better themselves. OR dating women who won't work well in the arena that they are trying to move in. I know some say that you can't help who you fall in love with. AND NO I'm not knocking women who haven't necessarily been exposed to various things in life BUT if she's not trying to learn more and do better...then what's the point. I've talked with a few guys about this and not many of them (those working towards greatness) want to date a woman who can't get dressed up to be shown off at the company gala because she's got a 'baby daddy' tat on her Arms, Legs, Backs, and Breasts ('betta check her tattoo-whoody Mannie Fresh). In the same line, they also don't want a woman who can't hold a conversation with the people in various circles. SO MY QUESTION is why are you even dating these women?

I recognize that to some I may seem picky. There are certain qualities that I look for in someone that I choose to date. Does this person match my swag? Can I see myself supporting them in their endeavors and would they support mine? This doesn't mean that I'm going to look over the guy who isn't "there" yet but is he on this way? Is he actively moving toward bettering his life? Does he mind getting dressed up to go out to mingle and socialize? Are the lives that we live and want to live compatible? I honestly think that if some people considered these things before getting into "serious" relationships with someone then time would be saved. The time that you take hoping that people will change into the person you need them to be...let's just save it. I love the idea of "taking the sugar off the rim" and being you UP FRONT. I'm me from jump. You like it or it's not for you. I'm not a fan of wasted time so I just prefer to show many (maybe not ALL) of the cards up front. Having some idea of what you might be getting into helps you not only figure out if you are up for the challenge but allows you to decide if its something that you want to invest your time in.

So with that...yeah...I'm checking for your swag..but not in the ways that you think :)